waste heat

Chapter 84

He didn't sleep well last night, mainly Song Yu, he seemed to be awake all the time, every time Cheng Yan woke up Song Yu didn't fall asleep, so early this morning, he found that Song Yu's eye circles were more tired again.

On the way to the breakfast shop, Cheng Yan couldn't help but ask.

"What's going on?" Cheng Yan touched the corners of his eyes and said worriedly, "You haven't slept well recently."

He can be so bad when he is still by his side, but what about when he is not around?Isn't it more serious?He can't sleep well like this, what happened to startle him like this.

"It's okay," Song Yu held his hand and paid the money. He was not in the mood to eat breakfast, and he didn't drink a sip of his soy milk, and said, "It will be fine in a while."

"It's going to be a while," Cheng Yan said, "It's been a long time. It won't work if it goes on like this. I have to go to the hospital. I'll accompany you there after school at noon."

"I can't sleep well, what can the hospital do?" Song Yu said, "It's because I'm emotionally unstable. I'm really fine. It happened to me before."

His violent complex has not been aroused, and now it is only a slight episode, which is emotional instability, which will cause sleep problems, excessive excitement and loss can easily lead to insomnia, and Song Yu has been used to it for so many years.

"Then have you been receiving treatment recently?" Cheng Yan asked him: "Your attending doctor...what did he say?"

Cheng Yan was very careful in using words in this respect, he had never been to a psychological club, and he didn't know what to call those people.

"I haven't watched it recently," Song Yu said, "I'm too busy, competitions, college entrance examinations, time will only become more and more tense, and it's not a real seizure, it's just a mood swing. It's really nothing, don't worry too much."

"How can I not be worried? It's just emotional fluctuations now. What if it gets worse? You promised me to receive treatment well, and it's irresponsible for me not to take myself seriously," Cheng Yan demanded: "Please ask someone in the afternoon Fake, I will accompany you there."

Song Yu said helplessly: "Are you serious?"

Cheng Yan took a bite of the steamed stuffed bun: "Yes."

Must go, there is no room for negotiation.

Song Yu didn't refuse any more, and agreed to ask for leave in the afternoon.

Just after the game, there is still something to do in the school team. It seems to be responsible for the handover. The third year of high school is about to take the college entrance examination, such as Song Yu, Han Cang, and Susu. , everyone gathered in the team, all arrived today, no one was missing, obeying the arrangement of the school team.

Susu is the gold medal assistant in the school team. The girl is a bit of a change in the tired training of a group of rough men, not to mention she is a big beauty. She will be eclipsed a lot when she leaves the school team, but Susu has already trained the next one. The assistant, also a girl, stood in front of everyone and introduced herself. She is not tall, and she is not amazing in appearance. Compared with Susu, she is quite different, which will definitely make many people feel a sense of gap, because she is too familiar with Susu. , I can no longer accept other people to take up this role, but fortunately, the new assistant knows the basketball rules very well, and she can take on the burden of the team assistant.

"Don't bully her," Susu said caringly. She was with a group of boys and knew some of their psychology quite well. "For my sake, I have to take care of her. Tingting likes basketball very much. I will definitely help you guys." A lot of things."

Before anyone could answer, Song Yu's eyes became uncomfortable. He glanced at the new assistant lightly, and asked in a deep voice, "What's your last name?"

"Ah?" The new assistant hurriedly said: "Oh, deputy team, my name is Lin, Lin Ting."

"Oh." Song Yu turned his head and turned his attention back to the list in his hand. He sat there and looked at the senior players in the school team who were leaving from today.

Cheng Yan frowned slightly, he stood in the line, his eyes focused on Song Yu who was sitting at a table beside him.

"Then let's announce the new captain. This is decided collectively by our school team," Han Cang said, "Zhu Fei and Master Wang, come out."

The two looked at the crowd, not knowing why, they walked out of the team and came to Han Cang.

"Zhu Fei is an old player. He has been in the school team for so many years and knows the rules and arrangements of the team. We decided to let Zhu Fei lead the team, and Wang Shi is the deputy team. Does anyone have any objections?"

Master Wang's strength is well known and his character is good, but he is a rookie after all, so there is still a little change, but this is the arrangement of the school team, no one has anything to say, as for Zhu Fei, he is just like what Han Cang said , veteran players, experienced, can take on this burden.

Everyone said no, and Cheng Yan was also a little surprised. He thought Zhou Xikuo would be a bad guy, because the Han team asked him before.

But Master Wang is not bad, they are all top-notch figures among the freshmen.

"Then it's settled like this," Han Cang said, looking at everyone, a little sad, he hasn't left yet, but this place that has stayed for so long will disappear from their lives and future, he is waiting, waiting Know nothing, farewell?Can't wait, don't like such a hypocritical end, Han Cang turned his head and said, "Do you have anything to say?"

He asked Song Yu.

Everyone looked at Song Yu who hadn't said much all the time. Their eyes were full of expectation and pleading. What are you begging for?Hope the vice team cheers them on?Give them a little encouragement, give them a little tender farewell?Anything can be done. In the school team in the south of the city, Song Yu is the belief of many people, the person who many people want to become, and the goal of how many people work hard.

"Then..." Song Yu turned the pen in his hand, scanned every familiar face, and some faces that were too late to be familiar with, he showed a slight smile to everyone, "Work hard, don't smash the south of the city. Shop sign."

Ye Qingjian: "Can't you say something nice?"

Everyone: "That's right, the deputy team, they're all leaving now, and they're still so cold."

Song Yu laughed, stood up and said: "What's the use of being nice? Can a few words improve your game skills? If not, then hold the bottom line for me. I don't want Chengnan's dominance in the basketball In our year."

The words are not nice, but there are also expectations inside. This is the team that Song Yu has been with for a long time. Everyone in this team gathers together for the same goal and because of love. He doesn't know if he will meet such a pure team again in the future and people.

"It's the last day, so let's talk nicely about the deputy team," someone said in a low voice, "Normally people in our team don't dare to talk to you, but it's the last day, and I mustered up my courage, deputy team, give me Is the goal okay?"

What Song Yu said was their goal. Some people admired him so much. It is not an exaggeration to say that Song Yu is a star in the south of the city. He has indeed achieved an achievement that few people have achieved at a frivolous age.

"Then we will meet at the top," Song Yu said, "We will meet on the court in the future, I hope you will be merciful."

I hope that at that time, they will all go further and further on this road, tie him, surpass him, and become opponents or teammates.

That's the end of the farewell. The men's team has lost a lot of warmth. It's not that they are too indifferent, but there are many things that they don't want to express in words.

Han Cang took Master Zhu Fei Wang and others to the meeting, and Song Yu also went. It was not time for practice at noon, and there were a few voluntary extra practice left in the arena, and everyone else went back to the dormitory.

Cheng Yan didn't leave, but sat by the ball stand, with the basketball rolling around at his feet.

Zhou Xikuo said, "Aren't you going back?"

Cheng Yan looked up and saw him, "I'm waiting for someone."

Zhou Xikuo guessed accurately: "Vice team?"

Cheng Yan nodded.

Zhou Xikuo held the ball rack, raised his hands above his head, and asked, "You and the vice team are really close."

Zhou Xikuo had some thoughts about his performance during this period of time.

Cheng Yan didn't deny it, even if Zhou Xikuo made it clear now, he wouldn't deny it anymore, Song Yu didn't want to hide him for a lifetime, and he didn't want to be an underground couple.

"The clothes don't belong to you, right?" Zhou Xikuo's thoughts jumped, and he focused on Cheng Yan's body, "It doesn't fit."

Cheng Yan looked down and explained embarrassingly: "Song Yu's."

Zhou Xikuo was a little surprised and didn't speak for a long time.

Cheng Yan changed the subject, remembered the arrangement of the Korean team, and took the initiative to mention: "I thought you would be elected captain."

Zhou Xikuo came to Cheng Yan, flicked the ball in his hand, moved to sit under his buttocks, "Why?"

"Because the Korean team asked me about you two days ago." Cheng Yan didn't mention this matter to Zhou Xikuo, and it was only after the arrangement was made today that he knew that there was no Zhou Xikuo, which was quite surprising.

"It's impossible to be the captain, and it's impossible for a rookie to lead the team. I haven't figured out the arrangements in the school team. It's okay to be a deputy," Zhou Xikuo said: "The Korean team talked to me two days ago. To be honest, Zhu Fei is an old man, and Master Wang's ability is not as good as that of the deputy team, but he is also top-notch in the team and is convincing."

"You can really think about it."

"Really," Zhou Xikuo smiled: "I've never been an official before, if you let me go up, I'm afraid it will be embarrassing."

Cheng Yan smiled at him, Zhou Xikuo touched his clothes and said, "Sleeping?"

Cheng Yan patted his hand away, his expression changed immediately, and he said bluntly, "Get lost."

It made Zhou Xikuo laugh out loud.

The appointment was to see a doctor, Cheng Yan waited for a long time, but the person still hadn't come out, Zhou Xikuo went back to the dormitory, he sat under the basket by himself, and after another 10 minutes, he finally saw those people leaving the meeting, But only Wang Shi and Su Su and others were seen, Song Yu was not seen.

Cheng Yan walked over and asked Susu: "Is the meeting over?"

"Well, it's over, I haven't left yet."

"I'm waiting for someone." Cheng Yan didn't say much, chatted with Susu about something irrelevant, and then walked to the conference room.

The door of the meeting room was open, Cheng Yan was about to go in, but heard a voice.

"What about Cheng Yan?"

It was Han Cang, Cheng Yan didn't want to eavesdrop on other people's speech, but Song Yu was the one who answered the conversation behind him, he couldn't move, he leaned against the wall, listening to the topic about himself.

"It's up to him. If he wants to stay, he can stay. I can't force him." Song Yu's voice, what are they talking about?Why is it still related to him?Cheng Yan was cautious.

After being quiet for a while, Han Cang said again: "It was your request to choose him, but after a new term, no one can protect him anymore. If he can't keep up, he will be eliminated. You have to be clear about this."

"I know."

"Just know it, let's go, it's all gone."

Hearing the sound of the chair being pulled away inside, Cheng Yan was about to run, but the distance from Song Yu to the door was different from the distance from him to the next corner, and he couldn't escape. As soon as Cheng Yan turned around, the people in the conference room came out Yes, Song Yu and Han Cang stood together, and behind him came his somewhat unexpected voice: "Cheng Yan?"

At that time, Cheng Yan really wanted to find a hole in the ground and get in. Every time he did such a bad thing, he would be caught by Song Yu. It was like a law. Cheng Yan turned around slowly, there was nowhere to escape, and he admitted that he was dead. Said: "I'm here...to find you."

Han Cang spread his hands, and looked at Song Yu, everything was kept silent.

_;

The door of the meeting room was closed again, leaving Song Yu and Cheng Yan sitting opposite.

Song Yu was at fault for this matter, his tone was uncomfortable, and he said worriedly: "Are you all right?"

Cheng Yan shook his head. He didn't blame anyone, but was a little surprised. It turned out that he still couldn't keep up with him. He thought he was on the same frequency as him, "So... I wouldn't be selected, right?"

Song Yu couldn't bear to say it, but after being heard, he couldn't hide it anymore, "It was almost."

To put it mildly, it was a bit close, in fact, it was a lot worse. You don't need to protect him like this, because his psychological quality is not so bad.

"I'm sorry." Cheng Yan clasped his hands together.

"Sorry for what?" This matter was decided by him, Song Yu and Han Cang. It was Song Yu who let him go through the back door. It had nothing to do with him. He didn't know about it. How could he be sorry?

Cheng Yan said in a low voice: "Because if I come in, I will crowd out someone's quota."

Maybe someone else should have come in, someone who is stronger than him, but because he took the spot and walked through the back door, he was not selected?The basketball team in the south of the city is so difficult to get in, and so many people want to get in, he really shouldn't be arrogant and think he can get in, he should have doubted it earlier, everyone said he couldn't get in, because his strength just wasn't up to that level, If you can't stand shoulder to shoulder with Zhou Xikuo and the others, you shouldn't be on the school team.

And he didn't win that qualifying match, even though he performed well, he couldn't compare with the outstanding people in other teams.

Song Yu heard the sound but smiled faintly, "You think too much, you didn't crowd out anyone's quota."

Cheng Yan raised his eyes.

Song Yu explained: "Of course I know it's unfair to do this. I can't make fun of other people's pursuits and dreams. There are so many people trying to get into the school team. How can I let you take other people's places?"

Cheng Yan still didn't quite understand.

Song Yu said: "Listen to me, I know you want to join the school team, and I have confirmed to you several times, you insist on joining, I don't want to let you down, I also have selfish desires, this is what I did in the south of the city. In the last year, I also hope to see you day and night every day. Choosing you to enter the school team is also to satisfy my own wishes. I will discuss with the Korean team and not let you take up anyone's spot. Just come in and have fun with everyone. Training together, if you can catch up with those people and reach the school team's standard, it's not a bad thing for the school team, but if you can't, you should be eliminated if you should, just like this joint school competition, I didn't let you play either, you haven't reached the strength to play the game, I won't let the people who should be selected have no chance just to please you."

"But I'm still in."

"Yes, you came in, just for my sake, as if I brought my brother into the team to play, don't disturb others, don't destroy other rules, what should happen in the school team, you don't have any privileges, "Song Yu said: "But even though I said this, it really can't change the fact that I let you go through the back door, but I don't care, I am willing, I am not just for you, but also to satisfy my own selfish desires. I did what I did, so it should be regarded as an abuse of private power."

Cheng Yan probably understands, he is like a gift in a commodity, you take it home, you can use it or not, just put it there, put it together with the genuine product, if you find it is better than the genuine product If it works, then you can use it, otherwise you can also abandon it, just give him a chance to try it.

"Did 21 people be selected this year?" Cheng Yan asked. The school team has only [-] places to be selected each year. If he didn't occupy other people's places, then he would be the extra one.

"You didn't see it?"

"I was so happy to be selected at the time, I didn't pay attention to many people."

"Well, 21, those 20 were selected according to the school team standards, you..."

"I came here because of your private rights." Cheng Yan is quite measured, not a particularly big sense of gap, because after entering the school team, he himself felt the difficulty, and the gap with others, now just proves that it is not He's too bad, but he shouldn't be on the school team at all. He doesn't have that strength, and he doesn't even have the qualifications to compare.

"I'm sorry," Song Yu saw that he was disappointed, touched his head, and comforted him: "If you want to blame it, blame me. I made this decision, and I kept it from you."

Cheng Yan shook his head, he was not so confused, "I don't want to blame anyone, this matter is my own problem, I am just afraid that I will crowd out other people's places, I am not a particularly noble person, but Chengnan's The school team is not good, if I delay others, I will feel guilty. Moreover, you have reminded me many times before, it is because I can’t understand the subtext. In order to follow you, I never listen to my true heart .”

How many times has Song Yu revealed it before?He asked him if he liked basketball, and if he planned to develop in this field, and his mother, she also asked similar questions, but she was too stubborn and didn't understand other people's minds.

Now that he has got what he wants and is with the person he wants, he doesn't need to be obsessed with following the footsteps, but should listen to his inner thoughts and wishes and recognize his true heart.

He has been pursuing others and following Song Yu's footsteps, but he has never found his own rhythm.

"I know that you do all this for me, and I would like to give you a chance to experience it, but I don't like you, Cheng Yan," Song Yu said, "You have things you are good at, and you have your own skills. In the future, you are not an ordinary person, and you don’t need to follow in my footsteps to become your shining self. You don’t need to chase after me, not only me, but many people will approach you, because excellent people are attractive in themselves, aren’t they?”

Cheng Yan is thoughtful, and he is thinking the same way. He is also considering whether what he is doing now is appropriate, whether it is what he wants, the future is in his own hands, and what kind of person he will be can be decided by himself. And destroying oneself is also a matter of one thought.

Training for so many days in the school team, training without passion is all pressure and torture for him.

He finally understands Song Yu's painstaking efforts, and finally understands the gap between them. He should not be a person on this road. As Song Yu said, he is good at different fields. Blindly pursuing things that he is not good at is the same at best. A kind of courage, at worst a kind of stupidity.

Do not do what should be done, and what should not be done must be pursued. He is not responsible for his own future, nor is he responsible for those who have expectations of him.

"I understand." Cheng Yan stood up, with clear eyes, looking at Song Yu calmly, "Then we will meet at the summit."

He responded to him with his farewell to the school team.

Song Yu smiled nicely, that was his best farewell to the school team, and it was also Cheng Yan's best farewell to himself who followed him.

Don't be someone else, follow yourself, you and I are good at different things, and when we reach the peak in our respective fields, we will naturally have the best encounter.

The author says:

become a better version of yourself.

Growth itself is to find your own rhythm little by little in the constant exploration.